The squat - 1.3 billion Chinese can't be wrong

Dear readers,

I am alive. I know there was grave concern to my safety after some of the things I had said to the establishment in recent blogs. However, as it turns out I am indeed just experiencing a spot of super business at work. But don't you worry, I am sure that will pass and I can get back to my fulltime blogging.


In most westerns lands people are familiar with the three r's. reading and writing and arithmetic. or my UFO spotting social studies teachers, The 5 p's pride in presentation produces perfection in performance. Most of you, and in particular the blokes, will be familiar the building blocks for any successful social outing the 3's. a S**t, shower and a shave. Might I add this is to be done in no particular order just not all at the same time. just in case you forget which hand the razor was in.

Well as it turns out the Chinese also have the 3's which applies to the same setting.
That is a squat, smoke and spit. Now unlike the western 3's, these ones can all be done at the same time, which takes multi-tasking to a whole new level. and whilst general standards of decencies require my 3's to take place in the bathroom. A Chinaman won't take a second thought as prioritizing convenience over social acceptance. And I use the term social acceptance here lightly because as far as community hygiene goes that bar isn't raised particularly high.


Case in point on my recent holiday to Lushan we were eating at a table outside when a family emerged from the restaurant. there little two year old stood next to the table and on prompting just started to bust out a leek right next to us. We really didn't know what to do. As a little tyke you really are given free license here I would say that toddler 2's out do the doggie doo's by about 3-1 out in the street. It's not a pleasant state of affairs. so please remember to take your shoes off at the door, when you come visit.


Seems a shame to stop talking about the bathroom, The other day up in Beijing I came across a public toilet, which I was contemplating using. I went in. But what do i find , four squat toilets in a row. And then it dawned upon me there were no walls. it was just a tiled room with a whole lot of sink holes in the floor. I just couldn't help but marvel at what a tremendous bonding experience this must provide for the men of the community. I then thought about the domino effect if the guy on the end lost his balance.

I for one respect the squat, albeit at arms length. When you think about it far more people in this world squat than not. If there was every a battle of the Dalton the sitters would need to invent some pretty pioneering tactics not to find them selves dangerously exposed.


On another note I don't know quite what a ; is for. I certainly think using it gives an certain ire of higher education. Mr qwerty obviously thinks its of more use than the : because you need to push shift to gain access to that. But in my writing history I think I have only used it once and that was entirely be accident because I forgot to push shift.